Three Words
by lostinspacexx3
Summary: Harvey has only said that combination of those three words a total of eight times in his entire life but, in each of those times, they never held the same meaning or feeling that they do when he thinks about saying them to Mike...and that terrifies him a little. Light Slash, Fluff. First 'I love you's. One-shot.


So, here's yet another fluffy little Suits fic, because yes it was necessary. So, enjoy! And review(:

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**Title ::** Three Words.  
**Disclaimer ::** Our (completely canon) Lawyer Boyfriends are not mine.  
**Summary ::** Harvey has only said that combination of those three words a total of eight times in his entire life but, in each of those times, they never held the same meaning or feeling that they do when he thinks about saying them to Mike...and that terrifies him. Light Slash, Fluff. First 'I love you''s. One-shot.

**Author's Note ::** 'Lenny' is Harvey's brother. His name only pops up once, so this is just a note to avoid confusion. I guess I can't claim the actual _character_ as mine but, I can claim the name right? Cause, in my headcanon, Harvey's brother's name is "Lennon"...which I shorted to "Lenny". Don't ask me why, it's just my warped imagination.

**Author's Note ::** The italic section (not the single words) is a small flash back, again, just saying to avoid confusion.

Harvey has only said that combination of those three words a total of eight times in his entire life. Sure, he's been told by numerous others that they felt that way about him but, growing up he saw an extremely warped version of what the words meant and he always felt like he couldn't return the feelings accurately towards anyone else. He felt like he wasn't really worth that type of affection. Harvey saw what that type of affection ended in and he vowed to himself that he'd never let that be him, he'd never end up in a relationship like his father had.

He only ever said the words to his mother once, he was nine and it was long before she became someone he resented but, she wouldn't give him a cookie unless he said it. So, he did, then took the cookie and ran.

He's said them to his brother twice, once after Lenny's motorcycle accident landed him in the hospital, in a coma, for two weeks and Harvey thought he had lost him forever. He also said it once after their father had passed.

Harvey said it to Jessica once. It was because She had given him the love and the life that he had always searched for after his mother had destroyed him. He could never find the words to express his gratitude for the major chance she took on him.

Harvey said it to Donna once, just after everything that had happened with Cameron Dennis. Harvey had stormed out of their offices, told Cameron that he wouldn't ever be coming back and Cameron shouted something along the lines of Harvey not being man enough to do what needed to be done. Harvey never looked back after that. But, three days later, Harvey came into Pearson Hardman and there Donna was, sitting outside his new office with her little box of things and told him that he wouldn't ever be getting rid of her that easy. Harvey couldn't ever let that type of loyalty go.

He also said them to his father a total of three times. Once when he was a kid, another time after everything that had happened with his mother, and once on the day just before he passed. Harvey sometimes regretted not saying it more often to his father. Though, Harvey knew that his father knew that he loved him, and Harvey found a little comfort in that.

However, in none of those circumstances, did the words hold any of the same meaning as they do when he thinks about saying them to Mike.

Family was different, when you say those words to family, the meaning is altered. Donna was by all means different, Harvey absolutely adored Donna but it's in a much more friendly manner. When he had told Jessica, it was because she became the protective boss that would fight for him and with him no matter what. She inadvertently became the mother that he never had growing up, but it was still in a different meaning.

Now, Mike? Michael James Ross, _he_ was different - much more different from any of the others.

When Harvey thought about telling Mike, he got traces of sweat on his palms and butterflies in his stomach - surely, there must've been a much more grown up way to describe that reaction - but, that's what it was.

It was really all the simple things that gave Harvey this urgent need to have Mike understand how much Harvey really felt for him, how much Harvey really trusted him. Mike could smile at him from across the table, or kiss his cheek while they were at work. It was the way Mike would let Harvey hold him while they were cooking dinner and the way Mike's hand slipped into his. Harvey thought about how perfectly they fit together in bed, or on the couch while watching movies (and/or other things) - movies that they inevitably end up quoting at each other - which was another thing Harvey would never get tired of. Mike was the one who always brightened Harvey's mood, always succeeded in making the older man smile no matter Harvey's mood before hand.

It was Mike's eyes that he fell for first, the beautifully intense blue color, showing all the emotions that Mike could never truly hide. Harvey enjoyed the way they'd light up when Harvey did something for him that Mike liked, the way the corners would crease when Mike smiled at him. Harvey also began to like seeing them closed, when Mike would sleep beside him, cuddled into Harvey's side and when Harvey would wake up in the morning to see his still sleeping beauty curled under the covers. Harvey really liked it when Mike's eyes slipped closed during a kiss, eyelashes brushing against Harvey's. Harvey's favorite was to watch Mike's eyes close during sex, head thrown back in pleasure, mouth falling open with sounds that Harvey would never get tired of hearing.

Donna was the one who pointed it all out to him weeks ago.

-x-

_Mike walked up to Donna's desk, placing a stack of files on the counter before reaching over to place a cup of her favorite coffee on her desk. He greeted her with a smile, as she stood from her chair. They talked for a little while before Harvey came sauntering out of his office._

_"Hey." Mike politely shifted his focus from Donna, smiling up at Harvey as he slid the files towards his boss. Harvey put his hand over Mike's on top of the folders._

_"Hey." Harvey responded and, for the moment, as Harvey stepped just a little more into Mike's personal space, Donna didn't mind being ignored by the two of them. They were quite adorable to watch._

_Donna smiled while Harvey pulled Mike into his office by the hand._

_She wasn't listening to their conversation - surprisingly - but, she did hear Harvey laugh and she saw Mike smile. She looked back just in time to see Harvey pull Mike in for a (really) long kiss before their associate headed back to his desk still smiling. Donna certainly didn't miss the way Harvey's hand grazed the backside of Mike's pants, or how Harvey's eyes lingered after him while Mike walked away._

_She recognized the fond look, the soft light of emotion in Harvey's eyes. Harvey even bit into his lower lip before turning around to look at something on his desk._

_Donna walked in seconds later._

_"You love him, don't you?"_

_Harvey immediately turned around, looking over at her. "Excuse me?" He looked at her like he had no idea what she was talking about._

_"It's simple. You. Love. Mike." She stated._

_"I have no-" Harvey started walking around his desk to sit down._

_Donna rolled her eyes. "Oh my god. You totally do." Harvey just started at her. "Oh please, I can see it Harvey." She walked towards him. "You love Mike." She repeated._

_Harvey didn't say anything this time and that was all the answer she needed._

_"Donna, what ever you do-"_

_"You think I'm gonna do something?" She cut in._

_Harvey tilted his head, jaw set in place for a moment. "I know you'll tell him."_

_"So you _do_ love him." It was more a statement than her looking for confirmation and they both knew that._

_"I never said that."_

_"But, you totally do."_

_"Donna." Harvey's voice was tight._

_"Okay, okay. I'm not gonna tell him." She paused. "But, you should." Harvey met her eyes as she walked closer towards his desk. "You can't be afraid of your own feelings, Harvey."_

_"I'm not."_

_"So then, you have told him already?"_

_"No." Harvey answered quickly._

_"Then, why not? It's blatantly obvious. I've seen you in other relationships, Harvey. I've seen you attracted to someone, but I've never seen you _in love_ with someone."_

_"So then how do you know that's what you're seeing?"_

_"That's exactly how I know, genius. It's because I've never seen you in love that I know that you're in love. Because, I've never seen you like _this_ Harvey."_

_"And what exactly is _this_?"_

_"For one, you're much happier, you're obviously less stressed and personally I think that must be from all the great sex you two must have but-" Harvey's eyes narrowed at her. "I'm just saying. You love him, and anyone who sees the two of you interact would tell you the same."_

_"That's not true-"_

_"So...then, you don't love him?" Donna cut in._

_"I never said that." Harvey said immediately with a shake of his head. Donna didn't miss the way Harvey's eyes widened, as if the thought that Mike could think Harvey didn't love him was terrifying in itself._

_"But, you never said that you did."_

_Harvey was quiet for a moment. "Why is this important to you? Don't you have work to do?" Harvey directed towards her desk._

_Donna ignored the gesture. "You love him."_

_"That didn't answer my question."_

_"Well, you haven't answered any of mine."_

_They watched each other carefully for several moments, a challenging smirk evolved onto Donna's face as Harvey glared._

_"I have work to do, files to go over."_

_"You mean the files you got from Mike? The Mike you _love_?" Donna teased with a smile._

_"_Donna_." Harvey groaned as his jaw tightened._

_"What?" Donna tried to look innocent before breaking into a smirk. "I'm serious though, Harvey. Tell him." She gave him a long look before walking back to her desk._

_Harvey couldn't even focus on the files after that. Donna noticed how he spent the next three hours staring down at one piece of paper. She had no doubt that he was thinking about Mike._

-x-

After the conversation with Donna, it quickly became the only think that occupied Harvey's mind.

He couldn't feel that way about Mike. Harvey had no idea what it all even meant, what it was supposed to feel like, what it was supposed to entail, how it was supposed to work.

The more he thought about it, the more he came to realize that his 'reasons' to avoid telling Mike didn't even stem from anything that had to with Mike himself. Mike was perfect to Harvey, bad past and bad choices and all. It was actually incredibly difficult for anyone to _avoid_ falling for Mike. All it really came down to was Harvey's self doubts and insecurities about if, or how, Mike would ever feel the same way, and that's what scared him.

The possibility of Mike not returning the feelings - it terrified him. He had no idea how he'd be able to handle knowing that. Which is why it was always a safer bet to bottle up his words - his feelings - and never mention them in front of Mike. It was just much more simple that way.

He was protecting himself, and Mike really, from all the repercussions that saying the words could entail.

Except, if Harvey was so against saying them, why was it that every time Mike smiles at him, or kisses him, or cuddles into him, or cooks dinner with Harvey wrapped around him, or holds Harvey's hand, or does _anything at all _really - they are always the first words that want to come tumbling out of Harvey's suddenly dry mouth? They sit at the tip of his tongue and Harvey has to literally bite down to keep them from falling out.

They are just words, Harvey should be able to say them because that's how he really feels and Mike has always been the one to get him to talk about his true feelings, he just has no idea if Mike would be able to say them back.

And that thought is what occupies his mind so much that he started thinking about it on Sunday and now suddenly it's Friday evening, close to seven, and Mike is standing in front of him with tears he's desperately trying to push back in his eyes and Harvey can't seem to piece together why.

"Mike, what wrong?" Harvey asks, standing from his desk.

"What's wrong? Harvey-" Mike took a deep breath. "If you're gonna break up with me, can you just do it already?"

"Break up with you? Mike, what the hell-"

"Dont give me that. It's almost been a week Harvey, _a week_, that you've been acting like this. I have no idea what's going on with you, so, if you're gonna do it, can you already? I can be civil about it, I just need to know cause, the whole guessing game? It's actually starting to hurt, okay? "

Harvey heart fell from his chest at that. "I...Mike, I wasn't - I'm _not_ breaking up with you." Harvey walked around his desk, reaching for Mike but, Mike backed away from him. Harvey met his eyes, confused.

Mike's chest hurt at the pain that flashed through Harvey's eyes when he stepped away. He swallowed that down though, speaking up instead. "Yeah? Then tell me what the hell is going on." He demanded.

Harvey got quiet and Mike bit into his lower lip, second guessing and slightly regretting bringing up the topic. "I've just been thinking, Mike-"

"Thinking?"

"Yeah." Harvey ran a hand over his face. "About us." He looked up at Mike after a moment of silence.

Mike looked undeniably hurt, even more than he did a minute ago, and Harvey's heart continued to sink farther from his chest as Mike tried to gather words.

"You just said you weren't breaking up with me." Mike said, those tears in his eyes coming closer to the edge.

"I'm not! I wouldn't-"

"The only thing that comes from someone saying 'I've been thinking about us' is usually a break up Harvey."

"Not all the time, Mike." Harvey paused, steeping towards him again - this time Mike didn't pull away, thankfully. Harvey tugged on his shirt and Mike reluctantly followed the motion, stepping close to Harvey's chest. "The _last_ thing you should _ever_ be thinking about, no matter what, is me breaking up with you."

Mike bit into his lower lip again, looking up at Harvey with big blue eyes - the eyes that reminded Harvey of why he fell for Mike in the first place. Except, now, they weren't bright and smiling, they were dusted with the threat of tears and Harvey never wanted to see Mike look like this again.

"Listen to me," Harvey wrapped his arms around Mike's waist, holding him close. Mike rested his arms against Harvey's chest for support. "I'm _not_ breaking up with you, I wasn't even thinking about breaking up with you, no where near it actually."

"Then _what_ is it?" Mike asked desperately.

"I was thinking about you." Harvey paused, taking a breath. "How I feel about you." Harvey met Mike's eyes, wishing Mike could understand what was going on in his head right now.

"About me?" Mike asked. Harvey nodded, holding him a little tighter. "How you feel about me?" Mike asked, a little nervously.

Harvey saw this and leaned forward, hands moving across Mike's lower back, bringing him closer to place a kiss into Mike's neck. "About how much I like you."

"How much you _like_ me, Harvey?" Mike sighed. "After almost eight months, _that_ occupied your mind for a week? I was sorta hoping you had that figured out when you asked the to dinner..."

"No, Mike. I mean, yes, I had it figured out - I just-" Harvey took in a breath. "I really like you."

"Yeah, Harvey...hence the last eight months? I mean, I thou-"

"Mike, you're not listening. I really, _really_, like you."

"I _got that_, Harvey. You like me, I like you? I feel like we've already had this conversation...like a while ago. Sometime around _eight months_, maybe?" Harvey shook his head gently with the traces of a smile as Mike watched him closely. "Seriously, Harvey. What is actually going on? I mean, did I do something? I will fix what ever you think I messed up-"

"You didn't mess anything up Mike." Harvey cut in.

"But I did do something wrong, didn't I? Look, whatever it was, I'm s-."

"You didn't do wrong anything either."

"Then _what_ is it?" Mike pleaded as he looked up at Harvey, big blue eyes begging for an answer - a straight answer, the real truth behind why Harvey's been acting this way all week.

Mike continued and Harvey looked at down at Mike closely, biting down on the inside of his lip, as the younger man kept talking. Harvey felt the words starting to inflame his chest, building up inside him and begging to be said. He needed Mike to hear them. Harvey needed Mike to now how much he felt for him, especially right now. But, could he say it? Could he say it and be okay if Mike didn't say it back? Could he be okay if Mike wanted out because he said it - who the hell is he kidding - like hell he'd be okay if Mike _ever_ left, under _any_ circumstance. But, Harvey couldn't hold it back any longer. They were right there and Harvey couldn't keep them from leaving his mouth.

"Mike, I love you."

That was it. Harvey said it. He said it and he couldn't take it back now. The words were out, he didn't bite his tongue fast enough to stop them this time. They tumbled out and into the real world, where feelings were real and words were real and what he just said, what just happened, was very real.

Harvey realized that he must've stopped Mike mid-sentence when he admitted it because Mike was staring at him with parted lips and wide eyes. Harvey chest tightened, Mike hadn't said it back, in fact Mike hasn't said anything at all in the last ten seconds and that made Harvey tense.

"...Did you just say-"

"I did." Harvey nodded, affirming himself more than Mike really. He did say it. He told Mike. Harvey told Mike that he loves him and there is no way to rewind that and take those words out of play. They were out now.

Mike stayed silent again and Harvey swallowed hard. He wasn't necessarily expecting Mike to say it back, he was a big kid now, he could handle a little rejection. He just wanted Mike to do something, say something, anything, at this point. Mike was no longer looking up at him, distracted by his own mind while looking at Harvey's mouth.

When another ten seconds passed, Harvey's heart just couldn't take it anymore. Maybe he wasn't as big a kid as he thought. "I'm sorry-" Harvey began to let Mike go, hands slowly falling from Mike's back, defeated.

The movement of Harvey's grip and the sound of his voice seemed to pull Mike back into reality, a reality in which Harvey felt he just destroyed a second ago with saying three words. Mike immediately gripped at the lapels of Harvey suit jacket, tugging the older man back into place.

"No, Harvey, I-" Mike paused, talking too fast, he took in a breath. "That's-" Mike fell quiet again, this time it was him who couldn't sort out his thoughts.

"Mike," Harvey sighed, not looking at him now. "I don't need you to say it back-" Harvey swallowed hard. "I just needed you to know. I'm a grown up. I can take it-" Alright, so that was a lie.

Mike shook his head, closing his eyes for a moment. Harvey looked at him, watching him much like Mike was before.

"Harvey, I love you too." Mike said, meeting Harvey's gaze.

"You don't need to-" Harvey's eyes drifted away from Mike.

Mike reached up, tilting Harvey's face to look at him again. Those tears were back in Mike's eyes and Harvey's chest hurt. Mike wrapped his arms around Harvey's neck, pushing closer into his chest. Harvey watched intently as Mike's tongue darted out to wet his own lips before speaking. "_I love you_." Mike said again, his voice was soft and sure, and Harvey realized the unshed tears in Mike's eyes were happy now, not like they were when this conversation had started.

Harvey could see that Mike wasn't saying it to just say it back, the emotion was there, the truth in Mike's words were right there in his bright blue eyes, the ones that got Harvey to start falling for him, just like it always had been. Harvey couldn't stop his smile after that. He wrapped Mike up in another hug, tighter than any other, and pulled Mike as close to him as possible.

"Yeah?" Harvey asked.

"Yeah." Mike laughed gently. They didn't move for a long moment, holding tightly to one another. "Say it again?" Mike asked after a gentle moment with a small smile, fingertips reaching into the base of Harvey's hair.

"I love you, Mike." Harvey smiled, leaning closer to him. "I love you." The words were whispered against Mike's lips. He repeated himself again, causing his lips to brush against Mike's as he spoke. Mike sunk farther into Harvey's chest, eyes slipping closed (Harvey did always love that) in anticipation. "I love you." Harvey whispered one more time before capturing Mike's lips with his own.

Donna, who came back just a little while ago to pick up her coat, was sitting outside at her desk and she smiled at the two of them before quickly grabbing her coat. They were entitled to at least a little privacy - she'd get all the details from Mike on Monday morning anyways.

Still in Harvey's office, they finally pulled away from one another to breathe.

"I can't believe you thought I was gonna break up with you." Harvey rested his forehead against Mike's.

Mike laughed gently again. "I'm happy to know I was wrong." Mike bit into his lip, looking up at Harvey unfocused.

"_Very_ wrong." Harvey mumbled, kissing Mike again.

Harvey leaned back a little on his desk, Mike moving with him as he leaned fully against Harvey's chest.

"I _love_ you, Mikey." Harvey said after they pulled away again.

Mike smiled at the nickname, and he didn't miss the way his heart kept skipping at the sentiment. "I love you too, Harvey." Mike pulled Harvey in for another long kiss after that, proving to him just how much honesty he had when saying it back.

With Mike's lips against his own, wrapped up in one another, Harvey began realizing that now that he had said it, Harvey didn't think he'd ever be able to stop. Mike moved soundly against him, body flush against his, and that's when Harvey realized that maybe he didn't need to _stop_ saying it.

He couldn't wait to tell Mike how much he loved him, every day after that - and even better, Mike _always_ said it back accompanied with a smile and a kiss - and that's all Harvey had ever wanted.

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I was sitting in photography and I was like, 'oh hey, I have a story to finish so I should go write that' and that's where this came from. So, I hope you liked it and review(:

Now, a bit after one a.m. right now and I bid you a goodnight!

Send me prompts, please! **buriedvoices-stolenlives** (. tumblr) (. com)


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